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lyrics

They may pour poison in your ear.
They may be brandishing a blackjack.
They may de-hair you from top to rear -
Though some people may like that.

Oh, there could be teeth extraction,
Or amateur rhinoplasty.
And splashing your eyes with acid,
Here we call homeopathy.

And over time a penile spine
The men have all developed.
You have thirteen floors left to walk up!

There are thirteen floors to go,
There are thirteen floors to go -
You better walk on slow.

(Slowly, slowly)

Well, it’s like a conga line but more versatile.
So do the Failure File.
Do the Failure File, the dance of disorder:
Take two steps back and kick heads clean off their shoulders;
Then grab your bolder-holder or your erectile;
Then a crippling low dip: and that’s the Failure File!

They may toss you in a bath of sea wasps.
Or dose you high with potassium chloride.
They may curbstomp your fragile voice box,
Or do expensive tailoring with your insides.

Billions of years left to bubble and squeak -
Musicians, authors, actors.
And still one person’s artistic peak,
Is another’s drop of bowel and bladder.

Oh, we all fail from snout to tail.
A bored, blank stare and drugged up,
You have thirteen floors to walk up.

There are thirteen floors to go,
There are thirteen floors to go -
You better walk on slow.
(Slowly, slowly)

Well, it’s like a conga line but deformed and hostile.
So do the Failure File.

Do the Failure File, the dance of disorder:
Take two steps back and kick heads clean off their shoulders;
Then grab your bolder-holder or your erectile;
Then a crippling low dip: and that’s the Failure File!

Do the Failure File, the dance of disorder:
Take two steps back and kick heads clean off their shoulders;
Then grab your bolder-holder or your erectile;
Then a crippling low dip: and that’s the Failure File!

Anchorhold Music/Girl Ratso ©2015

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from Total Rest of the Intellect (demos), released November 17, 2015

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David Safran Chicago, Illinois

David Safran is a writer, musician, and producer.. A noted figure in Chicago's music scene, Safran has attracted acclaim for his "boundary-breaking tunes" (WNUR) and dark, provocative lyrics "spike[d]...with humor" (The Chicago Reader).

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